xi
Prologue
April 28, 1999
7:00 a.m.
I woke up, and was aware that I was not sleeping on my side of
our queen-sized bed. Before I had a chance to wonder if John had
left for work, I noticed him standing near the side of the bed. I
must have been sleeping very soundly and missed the sounds of
John’s shower running and the hair dryer blowing—the noises that
always roused me from a deep sleep. I glanced up, sleepily, and
thought to myself, “John, did you go to work?” He looked somber
and weak. It had been a rough few months; something was terribly
wrong.
Stress seemed to have overtaken him these past few weeks, and
I feared that all of the whirling in his mind, and the recent confusing
days, weeks and months in our home were now twisting my
mind, too.
Was I imagining the fear—the distant, unfamiliar look on his
face? Was he really looking down at me like a lost little boy? I didn’t
know what to do. He hadn’t been himself for many months. Why
was he looking at me in such a confused way?
Before I could even ask him another question, he said, “I tried
to kill myself.”
Sunday, November 8, 2009
Advance Praise for NO MORESECRETS
Praise for NO MORE SECRETS: A FAMILY SPEAKS
ABOUT DEPRESSION, ANXIETY AND ATTEMPTED SUICIDE
Your book is fabulous! I was only going to read the first chapter and I
ended up reading each family member’s story. You are an amazing family
with an amazing story. Think of the lives you will touch by so
openly telling your story!—Cheryl
Wow, you did a GREAT job on the stories, treatment, support information,
and encouragements. I found everything gripping. This is a
great service you and your family are doing. Despite what many say, depression
is still kept in the closet all too often. Thanks for the privilege
of reading this. Congratulations!—Linda
I know that anyone who has encountered mental health issues, or anyone
who knows someone who has, (which is probably almost everyone)
will find this book useful. I think it is great how you incorporated actual
dialog into the book to portray a greater sense of reality. I also think it
was a wonderful idea to include your entire family, including their
thoughts, feelings, and perspectives. It enables all individuals, regardless
of age or gender, to relate to the book.—Harvey
You and your family are very brave for sharing your story. It takes much
courage to share stories such as these with the public. I wish you the
best with this book! I look forward to looking for it in the bookstore
once it is released!—Lisa
Very nice book cover. I read the manuscript and I was floored by the
sincerity of the story. Praise God! I know that you all will help other
families. Please don’t stop. Keep pushing. Keep trusting God to direct
you. It’s worth it! I understand the road can seem all uphill at times, but
know that God’s timing is perfect. I will continue to pray for you. I am
looking to have you all come tell your story.—Carla
Here’s to celebrating your courage and your beautiful life ahead! Your
book is well-written and very brave. I believe it really will help those in
desperate circumstances, often people just need to know they’re not the
only ones experiencing something so difficult.—Hilary
I was so touched by your book. Your beautiful and blessed family will
give so much strength and courage to other families who suffer from
depression and despair.—Elizabeth
I have no doubt God will use your family’s story to help many. Surely
His hand is in the timing with the despair so many are experiencing because
of the economy.—Marlene
I find this to be very interesting from a number of perspectives. I can’t
wait to see the finished publication.—Heidi
I truly believe this will be well received by thousands of people. So
many people do not know where to turn and there is such a social
stigma attached to mental illness. I know because we had a family situation
that was life altering for us. Will you be doing speaking engagements?
I could give you a list of local clubs. Your story is one that folks
should hear.—Nora
Thanks for allowing me to read your book. As I write this, tears still fill
my eyes and the hand of emotion still has its hands around my throat. I
feel all of the emotion from everyone having been on both sides of the
suicide picture, as a survivor and as someone with thoughts of suicide. I
am so impressed with everyone’s candor and honesty. I totally enjoyed
the different voices I heard in the writings surrounding the same story.
I’m hoping this is just the beginning of your story, and hope I will hear
more from all the contributors in the coming years. I would love to
continue an ongoing dialog to see how things go for each and every
one of you.—Doug
Hope and healing are what this book is all about.—Judy Collins,
Singer/Songwriter
Helping other families is a cause worth supporting.—Joey Pantoliano,
Actor/Director
Through healing, honesty and a passionate dedication to helping others,
the Gallaghers have become a profound and inspirational example
of the resilience of the human spirit.—Iris Bolton, Founder of The Link
Counseling Center
Severe mental illness does not discriminate by race, sex, religion or income.
There is no shame in getting sick, but there is real danger in not
seeking or getting treatment.—E. Fuller Torrey, M. D.
The Gallagher’s story is one of wisdom hard won and a victory that will
provide a guiding light to other families.—Xavier Amador, Ph.D.
NO MORE SECRETS
ABOUT DEPRESSION, ANXIETY AND ATTEMPTED SUICIDE
Your book is fabulous! I was only going to read the first chapter and I
ended up reading each family member’s story. You are an amazing family
with an amazing story. Think of the lives you will touch by so
openly telling your story!—Cheryl
Wow, you did a GREAT job on the stories, treatment, support information,
and encouragements. I found everything gripping. This is a
great service you and your family are doing. Despite what many say, depression
is still kept in the closet all too often. Thanks for the privilege
of reading this. Congratulations!—Linda
I know that anyone who has encountered mental health issues, or anyone
who knows someone who has, (which is probably almost everyone)
will find this book useful. I think it is great how you incorporated actual
dialog into the book to portray a greater sense of reality. I also think it
was a wonderful idea to include your entire family, including their
thoughts, feelings, and perspectives. It enables all individuals, regardless
of age or gender, to relate to the book.—Harvey
You and your family are very brave for sharing your story. It takes much
courage to share stories such as these with the public. I wish you the
best with this book! I look forward to looking for it in the bookstore
once it is released!—Lisa
Very nice book cover. I read the manuscript and I was floored by the
sincerity of the story. Praise God! I know that you all will help other
families. Please don’t stop. Keep pushing. Keep trusting God to direct
you. It’s worth it! I understand the road can seem all uphill at times, but
know that God’s timing is perfect. I will continue to pray for you. I am
looking to have you all come tell your story.—Carla
Here’s to celebrating your courage and your beautiful life ahead! Your
book is well-written and very brave. I believe it really will help those in
desperate circumstances, often people just need to know they’re not the
only ones experiencing something so difficult.—Hilary
I was so touched by your book. Your beautiful and blessed family will
give so much strength and courage to other families who suffer from
depression and despair.—Elizabeth
I have no doubt God will use your family’s story to help many. Surely
His hand is in the timing with the despair so many are experiencing because
of the economy.—Marlene
I find this to be very interesting from a number of perspectives. I can’t
wait to see the finished publication.—Heidi
I truly believe this will be well received by thousands of people. So
many people do not know where to turn and there is such a social
stigma attached to mental illness. I know because we had a family situation
that was life altering for us. Will you be doing speaking engagements?
I could give you a list of local clubs. Your story is one that folks
should hear.—Nora
Thanks for allowing me to read your book. As I write this, tears still fill
my eyes and the hand of emotion still has its hands around my throat. I
feel all of the emotion from everyone having been on both sides of the
suicide picture, as a survivor and as someone with thoughts of suicide. I
am so impressed with everyone’s candor and honesty. I totally enjoyed
the different voices I heard in the writings surrounding the same story.
I’m hoping this is just the beginning of your story, and hope I will hear
more from all the contributors in the coming years. I would love to
continue an ongoing dialog to see how things go for each and every
one of you.—Doug
Hope and healing are what this book is all about.—Judy Collins,
Singer/Songwriter
Helping other families is a cause worth supporting.—Joey Pantoliano,
Actor/Director
Through healing, honesty and a passionate dedication to helping others,
the Gallaghers have become a profound and inspirational example
of the resilience of the human spirit.—Iris Bolton, Founder of The Link
Counseling Center
Severe mental illness does not discriminate by race, sex, religion or income.
There is no shame in getting sick, but there is real danger in not
seeking or getting treatment.—E. Fuller Torrey, M. D.
The Gallagher’s story is one of wisdom hard won and a victory that will
provide a guiding light to other families.—Xavier Amador, Ph.D.
NO MORE SECRETS
Table of Contents No More Secrets Book
Contents
Opening Thoughts ix
Prologue xi
John’s Story 1
Patricia’s Story 27
Robin’s Story 61
Katelyn’s Story 65
Kristen’s Story 75
Ryan’s Story 79
Mom-Mom’s Story 81
Interview Questions for the Gallagher Family 85
Frequently Asked Questions about Depression 88
Resources, Organizations, Self-Help Groups 99
The Nicest Thing Anybody Ever Said or Did for Me 110
How I Fill My “Love Tank” When I Feel Depressed
or Anxious 113
How I Build Myself Up When I Am Feeling Not
Good Enough 123
What Money Can’t Buy 128
What to Do When You Are Feeling Sad, Blue, Anxious,
Down in the Dumps and You Don’t Want to Get Up
in the Morning 142
How Family Members Can Fill Their Love Tank When
a Loved One is Depressed or Anxious 147
A Team of Angels to the Rescue 151
Read Dads. Real Men. Real Families Campaign.
Real Depression Campaign. 153
Opening Thoughts ix
Prologue xi
John’s Story 1
Patricia’s Story 27
Robin’s Story 61
Katelyn’s Story 65
Kristen’s Story 75
Ryan’s Story 79
Mom-Mom’s Story 81
Interview Questions for the Gallagher Family 85
Frequently Asked Questions about Depression 88
Resources, Organizations, Self-Help Groups 99
The Nicest Thing Anybody Ever Said or Did for Me 110
How I Fill My “Love Tank” When I Feel Depressed
or Anxious 113
How I Build Myself Up When I Am Feeling Not
Good Enough 123
What Money Can’t Buy 128
What to Do When You Are Feeling Sad, Blue, Anxious,
Down in the Dumps and You Don’t Want to Get Up
in the Morning 142
How Family Members Can Fill Their Love Tank When
a Loved One is Depressed or Anxious 147
A Team of Angels to the Rescue 151
Read Dads. Real Men. Real Families Campaign.
Real Depression Campaign. 153
Friday, May 15, 2009
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